Quotes about Toxicity

I've identified four specific kinds of toxic waste that can poison our minds: (1) pessimism, which usually produces chronically negative thoughts; (2) anxiety, which usually manifests as fearful and worried thoughts; (3) bitterness, which pollutes our thinking with discontented and envious thoughts; and (4) criticism, which pumps destructive judgmental thoughts into our minds.

Ungrace does its work quietly and lethally, like a poisonous, undetectable gas. A father dies unforgiven. A mother who once carried a child in her own body does not speak to that child for half its life. The toxin steals on, from generation to generation.

REGARDLESS OF WHY YOU'VE MADE BITTERNESS AND HATRED YOUR BEST FRIENDS, IF YOU CARRY THEM AROUND LONG ENOUGH, THEY WILL EVENTUALLY EAT YOU FROM THE INSIDE OUT.

When a toxic person attacks us, let's think these words first: I honor my Father in heaven above all things. Pleasing you or getting you to agree with me isn't my first goal in life. After explaining his motivation, Jesus puts the issue back on the toxic person, where it belongs. This isn't about me because I'm honoring my Father; this is about you because you're dishonoring me.

There are certain people who drain us, demean us, and distract us from other healthy relationships. Long after they're gone, we're still fighting with them in our minds and trying to get them out of our hearts. They keep us awake. They steal our joy. They demolish our peace. They make us (if we're honest with ourselves) weaker spiritually. They even invade times of worship and pervert them into seasons of fretting.

One of Satan's cleverest attacks is getting us to pour our time and energy into people who resent the grace we share and who will never change, keeping us from spending time with and focusing on others whom we can love and serve.

The first line of defense against toxicity in the world must therefore be launched by believers who practice self-control.

Chapter 8 explores Jesus' famous passage where he warns us not to throw pearls to pigs. Chapter 9 looks at the difference between labeling and name-calling; if it seems harsh to you to call someone "toxic," you'll find this chapter particularly helpful.

God is radically for people. He wants everyone to come to a knowledge of the truth (1 Timothy 2:4). As his followers, we also must be for everyone, even if we oppose what they're doing. If we must live and work with toxic people, our call is to make sure their toxicity doesn't become ours. We don't treat them as they treat us. We don't offer evil in exchange for evil. We love. We serve. We guard our hearts so that we are not poisoned by their bad example.

As it pertains to you and me, let's admit we can't reach everyone, so let's invest our time in the reliable people we can reach. Find out who is toxic to you, consider walking away, and entrust them to God.

If someone is getting in the way of you becoming the person God created you to be or frustrating the work God has called you to do, for you that person is toxic. It's not selfish for you to want to be who God created you to be, and it's not selfish for you to do what God created you to do.

Dividers seek to make themselves look or feel better by making others feel worse. They damage relationships, fracture teams and organizations, and create havoc in people's lives.