long as I chose to see her that way, as long as I was not willing to give up my focus on her errors, I could not be at peace because I was not sharing God's perception.

To the extent that I withdraw my attachment to what you did, I will no longer be affected by what you did. I have decided to put my faith elsewhere. That is the miracle of forgiveness.

Forgiveness is a full time job, and sometimes very difficult. Few of us always succeed, yet making the effort is our most noble calling. It is the world's only real chance to begin again.

A cold heart that does not love suggests one of two things. Either it has never been forgiven, or it does not appreciate the depth of its forgiveness. In fact, much of our growth in Christ is simply growth in our understanding of what Christ has done for us.

The words of Romans 12:18 are important to remember. They instruct us to be at peace with everybody if we are given the chance. People who know how much they have been forgiven are to be willing to forgive everybody who earnestly repents of anything they have done.126

The 'wretch' who has been saved by grace] believes and feels his own weakness and unworthiness, and lives upon the grace and pardoning love of his Lord. This gives him an habitual tenderness and gentleness of spirit. Humble under a sense of much forgiveness to himself, he finds it easy to forgive others." 76

God gives you Christ as the foundation of your marriage. "Welcome one another, therefore, as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God" (Rom. 15:7). . . . Don't insist on your rights, don't blame each other, don't judge or condemn each other, don't find fault with each other, but accept each other as you are, and forgive each other every day from the bottom of your hearts. DIETRICH BONHOEFFER, Letters and Papers from Prison, 31—32

Having obviously forgiven me for the incident on the Starship, Stevie Wonder turned up one day and took out a snowmobile, insisting on driving it himself. To pre-empt your question: no, I have absolutely no idea how Stevie Wonder successfully piloted a snowmobile through the Rocky Mountains of Colorado without killing himself, or indeed anyone else, in the process, but he did.

I think it is important that we rebuild an atmosphere of forgiveness and civility in every aspect of our lives.

We need to show mercy. I mean, because as much mercy as you show people, that's the mercy you're going to be receiving.

When someone mistreats you, try to view it as an opportunity to grow in grace. See how quickly you can forgive the one who has wounded you. Don't be concerned about setting the record straight. Instead of obsessing about other people's opinions of you, keep your focus on Me. Ultimately, it is My view of you that counts.

He's staring into the face of fellow Israelites who don't know the grace of enemy love and who want to appeal too quickly to the lex talionis or who want to become judges like God (7:1—5; cf. Jas 4:11—12). Moreover, that same audience needed to hear that forgiveness is the way kingdom living works. Those who genuinely love others forgive. Those who don't are not kingdom people.